|Chan is in blue|
With children, there is a fine line between positive self-esteem and being humble. I experienced this first hand on Saturday.
Channing's last soccer game of the season started at 12:00 sharp. Approximately 30 seconds into the game, our little girl made her first goal of the entire season. We were joyful and she was on cloud nine! You should have seen the look on her face and the instant force of confidence that burst into her body. She beamed with pride the rest of the game. As a matter of fact, it was her best game all season, she was hustling and getting in on all the action she possibly could. So much so that she came a few centimenters away from scoring her second goal of the season. It was amazing, what finally scoring a goal did for her confidence that day. She was proud and we were too.
Once the game was over she came walking over to us to grab her water bottle and loudly and proudly proclaimed, "ME AND KALEY WERE THE ONLY ONES WHO SCORED A GOAL!!!"
My 'proud moment' kind of fizzled shortly thereafter. I walked up to her and quietly whispered in her ear that you don't say things like that out loud. She said "Ok", that's how I KNOW she heard me...then she proceeded to walk over to her cluster of teammates (and their parents) and SHOUT IT AGAIN!
"ME AND KALEY WERE THE ONLY ONES WHO SCORED A GOAL!!!"
TOTAL HUMILIATION...I just got finished letting her know that was she was saying was not to be said again.
In her defense, I know she was completely stoked about having just scored her first goal, she should have been proud. But what she didn't understand was that everyone was already proud of her and she didn't need to bring it to everyone's attention.
Channing's soccer team is AMAZING, there are some super talented girls on the team, girls who score 3 and 4 goals a game, girls who are proud of themselves, girls who do not shout about the multiple goals they make from the rooftops.
In steps mom with an opportunity to teach a life lesson.
"Channing, do you know what humble means?"
For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, that no one should boast. Ephesians 2:8-9
I talked to Channing about being humble, that God calls us to be that way. That if we do something good, it is not our job to announce it to the world or to brag about ourselves. When you do something good, others will notice simply because it is good, not because we bring it to their attention. I also shared with her that many girls on the team make goals at every game but we do not hear them bragging about themselves. And for those girls who haven't made a goal, she may have hurt their feelings by pointing out her success. In short, I told her that it's okay to be proud of yourself but that stays inside your heart. In order for others to be proud with you, you keep doing a great job it will not go unnoticed.
So, if you walk up to our 7 year old Channing today and ask her what humble means, she will be able to give you the exact definition.
I thank you Lord for the opportunity to minister to my child, to show her that it's not about us. Our successes all come from you and we are to be proud in our accomplishments but not boastful so that we may honor You. In Jesus' Name, Amen.